it was me, not the alcohol.

I feel shitty especially after everything that happened last night. I just don’t get it. I don’t blame the alcohol. I blame friends who tried to play savior. I don’t want people thinking that just because I’m tipsy, it follows that I’m too loose to think for myself. Puta naman.

Oo nga, nandun na tayo. Friends, we love each other like brothers and sisters. But sometimes, let me fall off the cliff. Or let’s jump off the cliff together. Or you can always break my fall. Or after falling together, let’s talk about the experience. ‘Cause friends, sometimes, I need to learn it by myself. I love y’all, but I just have to do things on my own.

But love is solid when I have like 8 out of 10 friends who’ll be willing to catch me after the jump. For that, much love and thanks goes for everybody.

And as for you: I’m an English major. We learned how to analyze sentences on the surface, down to its deep structure. But you know what; there is something in ‘I appreciate your honesty’ that I don’t get. That’s something that you have to spell out for me. And that’s something that I have to be okay with.

I remember bits and pieces. I trust my friends when they try to fill the gap. One question: what’s holding you back?